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Emma Spiegler

 

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SEX COACHING FOR MEN

Your 4 month, 1:1 road map to better sex, increased confidence and deeper intimacy.

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It's time to create a whole new level of intimacy, that leaves you wondering why you weren’t always doing it like this.

Overcome performance anxiety and erectile dysfunction (ED)

Get your desire for sex and libido back again

Take your sex life from good to mind-blowing

This isn’t just a men’s coaching programme, that will teach you skills and techniques to be a better lover. Having the skills and techniques is only half the picture...
This is where you transform, from the inside, out.
Where you can move from:
 

Performance anxiety (in the build up to sex, during sex and the embarrassing aftermath), to feeling that you know exactly how to tap into your zone of calm, and that you can skillfully navigate both of you back into pleasure.

A sexless relationship (where you feel that no matter what you do for your partner, it’s just not good enough), to her expressing just how grateful she is to you for showing up and providing for her practically, emotionally AND importantly, how you please her sexually.

Sensing that your masturbation feels empty and leaves you tired, low and unmotivated, to having an extraordinary relationship with your penis and your pleasure, leading to connected and deeply satisfying sex, with your lover or partner. 

A lost desire for sex (where work pressure has left you drained and feeling that you are letting your partner down, by not giving her pleasure nor wanting sex), to getting to the root cause of what’s blocking your desire and getting your libido back.

Feeling criticized by your partner, disconnected, and looping on the same arguments, to deep connection, understanding of each other's stress (and/or trauma) showing up in your relationship and skillful in how you navigate triggers.

Feeling that you are always the one who initiates sex and that you are tired of being rejected, to having your lover/partner initiate sex with you and feeling her genuine desire for sex with you.

"I've worked with a few coaches and I found Emma to be elite."

A.M. / LONDON

This is FOR YOU if:

 

  • You suffer with Erectile Disappointment/Dysfunction and have been taking medication for some time. You feel exhausted from the continual low-level anxiety, that the next time it may not work. 

 

  • You live with each other, have a wonderful friendship, but it stops right there.  You feel more like best friends than lovers. You feel like you are carrying an embarrassing secret, that you and your partner are not having sex. The longer it goes on the more hopeless you feel about fixing it.  

 

  • You cannot even remember the last time your partner expressed desire for you and initiated sexual intimacy. This leaves you feeling low and questioning whether you are sexually compatible or even with the right partner

 

  • You suffer with performance anxiety.  You hold back on arranging dates with potential partners/lovers, because your last sexual experience was awful and left you feeling like a failure, as a man.  You are in an anxiety loop of dreading what could go wrong next time you have sex. 

 

  • Your confidence is at an all time low. You want to be a good lover. You’ve tried reading the articles, buying the sex toys and watching Youtube videos. You feel despairing and don’t know what else you can do to please your partner. 

 

  • You feel different to other men. You are sensitive, sensual, seek depth and emotional connection.  If you don’t feel in tune with your lover, then you are simply not interested in having sex.  

 

  • You work tirelessly to provide for you and your partner, yet you end up coming home with an empty tank and the last thing you want to do it initiate sex. You feel guilty that you are not providing in an area that’s very important to your relationship - sexual fulfillment. 

Ultimately, you know that you have the potential to be an

extraordinary lover. 

 

It's within you, yet something's getting in the way...

 

The late night arguments that never get resolved and leave you both feeling exhausted and distant the next day. 

The low level, ongoing tension and the repetitive arguments over whose turn it is to put the bin out or wash up, because you just aren’t having sex. 

 

The ways you hold back from putting yourself out there, as a single man, for fear of rejection and/or embarrassment. 

 

The regular ways you avoid sexual intimacy, by binge-watching Netflix, staying late at work and finding any excuse, so that you don’t have to face the humiliation of not getting hard when you want to. 

You are not alone. These issues are much more common than you think.

Men tell me that improving their sex life leads to positive changes in other areas of their intimate and professional lives. This is exactly WHY I do this work.

Men come to be because they are stressed out, and this has impacted their intimacy. Or, issues in their relationship is impacting their work life. I know all too well how stress took over and impacted my life and capacity to experience pleasure in my body. 

 

Prior to becoming a sex coach, I was the Founding CEO of an award-winning, national charity, for young people impacted by a parent's substance misuse.  After spending over a decade, working beyond my limits, within the addiction and mental health fields, I experienced extreme burnout.

 

I was too exhausted, anxious and stuck in my head, to even contemplate a life where I prioritised and could fully enjoy my sex life. 

 

Through burnout, my whole life changed radically. I had to stop working and look inwards. I needed to listen to my body, slow down and put myself first. 

 

Over the following decade, I immersed myself in body-based healing. I experienced profound shifts, overcame my burnout and discovered how to live in a way that worked for and not against me. A huge part of my healing was studying with conscious intimacy teachers across the world, and getting certified as a sex coach.  

 

I discovered a whole new world, that I didn't even know existed. What I found was...

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When I connected with my sexual energy, I felt powerful within.

Once I was taught this, I was able to make huge changes in my life.  I felt like I was carrying the world's best kept secret in my back pocket.  No matter what challenges I faced in my life, I had access to an inner core strength and resilience.

I'd had fifteen years of talk therapy, but one vital piece was missing. In order for me to overcome sexual shame, anxiety in intimate relationships and lack of desire, I needed to include my body in the healing process. Only then was I able to experience deep sexual fulfilment. 

 

I've distilled all that I've learned in over a decade into my Mind, Body, Energy Coaching method.

No matter where you are on your sexual journey, it’s not just the techniques that will get you to where you want to go. 

 

It’s the inner journey that will give you the clarity, confidence and map to getting you; the sex you desire, the relationship that is emotionally safe AND intimacy that is sexually exciting.  

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My work focuses on supporting men with performance anxiety in the bedroom, to overcome erectile disappointment (erectile dysfunction), to communicate effectively, and experience incredible sex. 

Your sex life matters, and you too can experience deep sexual fulfilment.

No matter how many books, videos and podcasts you consume on sexual confidence, performance anxiety, and women’s pleasure, there is one vital piece of the puzzle, that is necessary for true transformation. 

The sex toys, sexy lingerie, various positions or medication, will not get to the root of your sex life challenges. To shift how you feel, it’s vital to include your body. 

You cannot just think yourself into a new reality. You have to feel your way into a new way of being. 

It’s not what you do, it’s how you are.

“My relationship with desire, sexuality and women has been utterly transformed. I feel so much more clarity, confidence and ease in this area of my life."

JESSE S / CALIFORNIA

Two of the most common problems that holds men back, are subconscious beliefs around performance and wanting to give a woman the best pleasure she has ever had.

These beliefs directly impact how men feel towards receiving and enjoying sex fully (both in solo masturbation and partnered sex). These blocks are not just held in the conscious mind, but also held in the subconscious and in the body. 

 

For the men I work with, the effects of stress and negative thinking further compound their stress, which impacts their ability to be present, connected and enjoy sex. Particularly for men who suffer with erectile disappointment, it’s the anxiety loop which leads them to lose (or not be able to sustain) their erection. 

 

For some men, the constant comparison to people in films or in porn, sets them up to feel like they are not matching up to perceived performance standards.

Or they simply don’t have a map to take them to where they want to be in their sex life, dating life or long term relationship, so turning around a sexless relationship after years or months of no sex, seems like an impossible mountain to climb. 

- Do you feel like chronic stress and negative thinking is impacting your ability to be present, connected and enjoy sex? 

- Do you suffer with erectile disappointment (erectile dysfunction) and experience anxiety, around whether you will be able to be hard for sex and/or sustain your erection?

- Do you catch yourself comparing your sexual performance, leading to you feeling bad about yourself?

Are you currently experiencing a sex hiatus in your relationship and feel like bringing sex back into your relationship is an impossible mountain to climb?

As a result of these negative beliefs...

You will simply stop having sex altogether.  You're avoiding it, because it’s too shaming or confidence-destroying to attempt to have sex.

 

It’s also not just the subconscious beliefs you are holding,  it’s the patterns and ways that you relate to yourself, your body and your penis.

 

For example, you may lean more on your masturbation habits for a release and quick fix, rather than an experience that’s a real energy boost and feels really GOOD!!

This sex negative culture doesn't just impact men - it's all of us... 

As a collective, we now have a bunch of ill-advised truths, tips and tricks about sex to unlearn. Sadly, we have been taught so many myths, when it comes to sex. That sex just should happen, be really good and that we both orgasm simultaneously. 

 

What you have seen on the screens couldn’t be further from the truth. SEX IS A SKILL THAT CAN BE LEARNED. 

No amount of sex toys, sexy lingerie, new positions or taking medication will get to the root of how you transform your sex life.

You are not alone in trying to fix an internal issue with external things.
It doesn’t have to get to the point where you:

  • Question your sexual compatibility leaving you feeling exhausted and insecure because you are in a state of emotional ambivalence. 

  • Feel that you are broken as a man, because you never desire sex with your partner. 

  • Consider separating or getting a divorce, because you deeply desire a great sex life, but can’t see how that’s possible with your partner.

  • Stop dating altogether, because of the anxiety, embarrassment and fear of failure to perform, is holding you back from putting yourself out there.

 

The mind and body are interconnected.  We deal with your issues on the levels of mind, body and your energy (e.g how stress shows up in your body).

 

So you can feel:

 

  • Confident, relaxed and excited about sexual intimacy, so that when you plan your date nights, you know exactly how to create a great night of pleasure for you BOTH.

  • Powerful and confident, that you know how to lead your partner into indescribable states of pleasure, where they are inspired to want more and more, and in turn initiate sex with you.

  • Secure in your relationship, now knowing that you are having sexual intimacy again, after what felt like an insurmountable problem. 

“Ultimately, although sexual performance was at the root of my reason for working with Emma, everything we did together improved all sorts of aspects of my life. From self pleasure, to communication and understanding with my partner, to happiness and a better attitude in my wider life!"

A.O. / LONDON

If you want to develop an unshakeable confidence within, that you know how to pleasure your partner, heal the sexual rift between you and enjoy sex, no matter whether you are hard, soft or in-between. 

 

If you want to learn techniques, that will take you from feeling like you’ve lost your mojo, to knowing how to fill yourself up with powerful, turned-on sexual energy. 


If you are ready to take a stand for thriving in relationship, emotionally AND sexually then I have something for you.

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Introducing the Men’s Sex Coaching Programme;

Your 4-month road map to better sex, increased confidence and deeper intimacy. 

So you no longer have to reach for the short-term fixes and instead have the tools, techniques and long-term solutions that work.

This is an in-depth, 4 month, private 1:1 coaching programme based on the science of the nervous system.  I use a powerful combination of tools including;  breathwork, pleasure and meditative practices, energy work, sounding, and movement that can resolve the deepest of issues.

 

This Mind, Body, Energy method offers a completely unique approach to addressing sexual and intimacy issues and is designed to support you to:

 

  • No longer feel stressed and finally overcome the anxiety you feel about your performance and ability to please your partner. 

  • Increase your sexual confidence, so that you know exactly how to create meaningful, deeply connected, highly satisfying sexual experiences with your partner/lover.

  • Stop feeling like there is something wrong with you, as a sexual man and tap into your sexual energy and feel turned on and excited about sex. 

  • Feel confident you can please your partner, whether you have an erection or not. 

  • Boost your authentic sexual confidence, so that women and your partner are naturally drawn to you and are turned on by it.

  • Feel unapologetic in asking for what you want in the bedroom, and how you express yourself sexually. You’ll learn how to cultivate a strong, rooted, grounded connection with your body, your penis and your sexuality.

  • Exponentially increase the amount of pleasure you experience through sex, by learning how to move your sexual energy from your penis and testicles to ALL over your body. You will be able to last much longer, when your partner asks for more.

This isn’t just problem-focused coaching, zoning in on all the things that aren’t working. We get to the core of what you want in sex and intimacy and take this as our guiding vision, over the 4 months.

 

This is desire-led coaching.  We focus on what feels good and expand on that.

"I have always had a good connection with women but now it’s a whole different connection. On an emotional level, I am there. Had I known what I know now at the beginning of my marriage it would have been a different type of marriage and would have changed the dynamics." 

S.B. / CANADA

Take a moment to imagine...

 

how different your sex life could be in four months' time. You'll have me there by your side, helping you to turn it around.  This is deeply powerful work that supports you to switch off your critical mind and drop into your body.  This is where true depth of intimacy can happen in your relationships.

 

This isn’t coaching that focuses on techniques to give your partner the best orgasm or how to stay hard for longer. This is far deeper than that. It’s transforming the way you relate to your sexuality, so that you are freed up to fully enjoy sex, and co-create mind-blowing sexual experiences.

With the Men's Sex Coaching Programme, we create the exact map that will get you to your desired destination.

You may be asking how do I get my map and the results?

Let’s take a look at the method that I use:

This immersive 4 month coaching container includes; in-depth body-based sessions, talk-based therapeutic and coaching techniques, neo-tantra, high quality information and education around stress and the nervous system.

MIND

Rewiring your thoughts

Together we will look at the thoughts you hold about yourself, sex and intimacy.

 

We will get crystal clear on exactly when and why you experience negative thoughts around your lack of desire, your sexual performance, your erections and how you show up in your sexual expression.

 

You will be rewiring these thoughts so that you can feel confident, powerful and relaxed in intimacy. 

We’ll be looking at the difference between male and female arousal patterns, using powerful communication tools and high quality information on moving sexual energy and mastering your sexual energy.

BODY

Stress Release & Ease

We’ll look at exactly how stress impacts your body, especially when it comes to sex, your erections and your desire for sex. 

 

We will build the foundations for our work together, by supporting you to feel a sense of safety, love and belonging in your body.  

 

I’ll be guiding you through body-based practices that will support you to develop a strong mind/body connection and increase your potential for self regulation (the ability to feel calm and good within yourself), co-regulation (the ability to help your partner feel calm and settled) and expanded states of pleasure. 

 

You’ll be creating new pathways in your body and mind, that connect your heart with your sex (your genitals and surrounding area), so that you can have much deeper, meaningful and highly pleasurable sexual experiences.

ENERGY

Mastering your sexual energy

I will give you the tools to learn how to move your sexual energy all over your body, so that you can experience both localised orgasms in your genitals and non-localised full body orgasms. 

 

With this knowledge and skill, you’ll be able to masterfully choose WHEN you ejaculate and HOW LONG you want to enjoy sex for, both solo (when masturbating) and partnered. 

 

This is especially important if you suffer with ED (Dysfunction or better termed, Erectile Disappointment), because it will give you tools to enjoy sex no matter if you are hard or not! 

 

I’ll be helping you identify where you hold tension in your body during sex or masturbation, so you can release these holding patterns, which will be blocking you from feeling more pleasure. 

 

By identifying your holding patterns, you’ll have the skill and awareness to pause and take a moment to relax and choose to rewire, to more pleasurable ways to experience FREEDOM in sex.

This is a results-based, structured methodology designed to:

  • Get the CLARITY on what your blocks are, in your mind, body and energy, so that you can stop experiencing ED, performance anxiety and lack of desire for sex

  • Increase your CONFIDENCE as a lover, knowing exactly how to turn your partner on (according to her sexual style!) and have the techniques that put YOU in control of when you ejaculate

  • Teach you how to RESPOND rather than REACT at high-pressure times, when you feel anxious that you will not be able to perform sexually 

  • Find out exactly what it is that’s been dampening your desire for sex, so that you can get your sexual fire back and feel sexually ALIVE 

How do we achieve this?

- 8 fortnightly, 90-min calls (via Zoom video)

 

- Tailor-made guided-audio practices (with specially selected music), to support you to relax and rewire your subconscious mind.

 

- In-between support and accountability, via WhatsApp/phone/email

- Bespoke, personalised, structured, fortnightly home-play, practical actions steps and body-based practices, and resources

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Through this highly-immersive coaching experience, we are taking targeted action to resolve your sexual issues. You will walk away with a totally new way of experiencing your sexuality and your sex life. 

You’ll have my support every step of the way, so that when you have some amazing new updates or issues that have come up since the last session, I am there to help you with solutions and new ways of looking at your problems. 

AND there’s MORE…

You will have free access to masterclasses (filmed with experts from around the world), on sexless relationships, multi-orgasmic sex and professionally-filmed vulva, breast, penis and testicles massages.

This coaching is FOR YOU if:

- You are ready to commit to a deep, transformational process and put in the time and energy.

- You want to transform outdated beliefs from the past and you're ready to embrace old patterns and create new ones at the same time.

- You are ready emotionally, financially, and have the time to invest in home-based practices, in between sessions.

- You want to try something new, deeply transformational and dive into your body’s wisdom.

- You have previously been to a coach or therapist and done some sort of healing work already.

This coaching is NOT FOR YOU if:

- You are not ready to take full responsibility for the results you get in life.

- You expect instant results, without putting the work in.

- You are not committed to showing up fully to the calls and the in-between home-play (minimum of 1-2 hours a week).

- You're not ready to commit time, energy and money to your goals.

- You aren’t prepared to re-prioritise your sexual fulfilment and intimacy in your relationship, for this period of time.

IF you resonate with how this IS FOR YOU then you are in THE RIGHT PLACE.

 

Imagine what it will feel like to…

 

  • Wake up in the mornings next to your partner, who initiates sex with you, in the most delicious and sensual of ways.  You have a beautiful love-making session, that leaves you both lost for words and smiling at each other with PRIDE that you just created that together.

  • Plan date-nights for a lover or partner, with absolute confidence that you are going to have a great night of sexual play, eroticism and pressure-free sex. You feel excited, turned-on and ready.

  • Finally be able to FULLY enjoy sex, and FULLY receive in sex - no matter whether you are hard or not.

  • Get the feedback from your partner or lover, that she had an incredible night of pleasure. 

Your Investment 

4 MONTHS COACHING

Pay in full

£4,800

4 MONTHS COACHING

4 Month Payment Plan

£1,200

4 MONTHS COACHING

8 Month Payment Plan

£600

This pricing allows me to provide a high level of service for you, keeping you on-track and accountable in a supportive way. When clients commit to working together for 4 months, this allows us to go deeper and get the most amazing results this work has to offer. 

 

Prices for this work are not per hour, but per package, because of the additional time I spend outside of our sessions.  This includes supporting you with calls, emails and messages, as needed, resources and creating bespoke practices to help reprogramme your subconscious and achieve your goals.  

 

Our first step is to have a Clarity Call (click the link below).  The Clarity Call is an opportunity to get clear on your goals, to understand where you are in your journey, and confirm that we are a good fit for working together.

 

By the end of the call we will have clarity on what it is you want to achieve and you will know the pathway of how we are getting there.

 

To secure your booking for the call there is a non refundable deposit of £100. If we are good fit for for working together, this will be deducted from the coaching programme investment.

ABOUT

About Emma

I'm a Certified Sex and Relationship Coach, with over 1500 hours of coaching experience. I am dedicated to guiding men, to create epic sex lives and deeply satisfying relationships, grounded in the foundations of love and safety. 

 

For over a decade, I have been on a deep sexual healing and empowerment journey. Including; retreats around the world, talk and body-based therapy, weekly dance movement meditation classes, and studying for over 600 hours for a professional coaching certification in VITA™ (The Vital and Integrated Tantric Approach, created by Layla Martin).

The VITA™ method takes the most effective teachings of modern neurobiology, holistic healing, and coaching, and blends them with ancient wisdom from Tantra, Taosim and Sacred Sexuality. 

 

Prior to becoming a certified Sex & Relationship Coach, I worked in the mental health and addiction fields. In addition to this, I was the Founding CEO of a national award-winning charity, for children and adults impacted by parental substance misuse. I ran this charity for 10 years and managed a national team of peer mentors and trained counsellors. 

CONTACT

Please feel free to contact me by email.

Or alternatively fill in the form below, and I will get back to you as soon as I can.

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