"Shame is nature's cocaine"
From Grace & Frankie - Netflix
As a long time feeler of shame at my very core...this line cut right through to my gut.
Here's the thing about shame: - It has a sneaky way of finding back door routes to start up a shame loop, going deeper down the shame spiral - It happens when we are already not feeling at our best, maybe tired, anxious, hungry, pressured, demotivated
- It activates the reward circuit in our brain, so in a strange way it can feel good to feel bad
Here are 3 things that can support us with breaking the cycle of shame: 1. Catch it....catch the chain reaction of the stress chemical of cortisol being released into the body from the adrenal glands. Notice when it comes up and understand that shame has created a stress response in the body. 2. Find that voice of shame, what is it saying today...'I shouldn't have said that...or that was a bit over the top...or I looked foolish when I did that' ... 3. Find a part of you that can feel love and compassion for the voice of shame and offer it some reassuring words. 'You were doing your best' 'I actually think you did a great job' 'I think people think lovingly towards you, they won't be judging you in this way'. This could be your inner protector, your inner parents, your inner best friend. 4. Work with me for a one off coaching session!!
At this difficult time in a unique period of history we can up our self care. We can tend to the parts of us that may be caught in anxiety or shame loops, understandably so. We can catch the loops and choose to activate the reward circuit in a different way, we can connect to emotions of care, love and compassion. We can offer ourselves loving touch, such as a self hug, a stroke of our arms.
I am now offering ONE OFF coaching sessions. So this if for you if: - You have been following my work and it resonates with you - You want to do something different - You want to dive deep and you are ready to do so
Sessions can include: - Guided meditation to ground a sense of safety into your body - Identifying the part of you that is feeling anxious, shameful, de motivated, stressed and create a dialogue with this part, giving it a voice, finding out what it needs from you in that moment - Connecting with your inner child in a very real and meaningful way - Finding the part of you that is empowered to shift your internal state to offer self soothing touch to release oxytocin a natural stress reliever and strengthening this resilient & self care taking part of you - Identifying some empowering beliefs that will support you right now and the support to anchor them into your body and subconscious mind
The coaching session is 1.5 hour and you will receive detailed notes afterwards along with a guided audio practice to support the integration of the session.
The guided audios have music in the background that guides you to relax so you can re programme your subconscious mind!
Contact me via email email@example.com to arrange your one off session and find out more.